Marriage Crisis | My Relationship Experts

Why Communication Problems Lead to Marriage Crisis

How to Save Your Marriage from Divorce

by Dr. Rob and Dr. Lynne

December 2024

Representing:

My Relationship Experts, and

Eternal Light Christian Counseling Services

Are you tired of this...

The Misfire Symphony

Your conversations sound more like two ships honking at each other in the fog than a duet of understanding. One asks, “How was your day?” and the other responds, “Fine,” as though reading from a script in the world’s dullest play.

The Slow Emotional Fade-Out

Intimacy feels like trying to start a campfire with soggy matches. The spark isn’t just gone—it packed its bags, left a note, and said, “Good luck finding me!” Now you're left with a chilly emotional campsite.

The Battle of the Petty Kingdoms

Or worse, every conversation turns into a championship debate no one signed up for. You're arguing about the thermostat like generals waging war over strategic territory, and every "good morning" feels like a potential opening salvo.

But, what if...

Your marriage becomes a dynamic tango, where even your quirks sync perfectly. Conversations flow like a well-rehearsed jazz improvisation, intimacy becomes a daily dance of laughter and connection, and “fine” is replaced with heart-to-heart vulnerability. Problems are met with unity, not avoidance, as you build a love so strong that even Netflix would cancel itself for being in its shadow.

How to Save Your Marriage from Divorce

in 5 Simple (but not easy) Steps

1. Understand Each Other’s Core Temperament

God's Blueprint for Connection

Think of your spouse’s temperament as their God-designed user manual—it’s how they’re wired to interact with the world and with you. Are they a Choleric, naturally driven and independent? Or a Melancholy, thoughtful but prone to overthinking? Understanding these traits helps you approach conversations with empathy rather than frustration. Proverbs 20:5 reminds us, “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” Instead of misinterpreting silence as indifference or enthusiasm as overbearing, learn to decode their core temperament. You’ll see the beauty of God’s design in how your differences can complement each other.

2. Stop Debating the Thermostat

Start BEING the Thermostat

You probably didn't start with the question of how to save your marriage from divorce. Instead, it's "how did we get here? Why are we always fighting?" Quarreling over small things like the thermostat often signals deeper power struggles (read: unresolved issues of control or resentment). Address the heart of the matter with what Temperament Therapy calls “mutual deference”—letting Christ’s humility guide you. Philippians 2:3 reminds us, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” Imagine life where both you and your spouse set the temperature to 'peace' with intentionality.

HINT: Dr. Lynne leans into root causes of conflict to help you deeply understand each other. Can you see beneath the surface of your spouse?

3. Revive Intimacy...

from a Bruised Reed or a Flickering Flame

When intimacy feels like a dying campfire, remember Matthew 12:20: “A bruised reed He will not break, and a smoldering wick He will not quench.” God restores even dim sparks. Intimacy needs patience and care, like tuning up a classic car. Start small: a kind word, a gentle touch. Awkward? Sure—like slow dancing to heavy metal. But persistence matters. With God’s help, sparks ignite, warming not just your marriage but your whole home. Keep tending the fire.

4. Confront Infidelity

Rebuild the Walls of Trust

Cheating. Adultery. They strike like termites, silently gnawing trust’s foundation. But Nehemiah 2:17 reminds us, “Come, let us rebuild the wall… and we will no longer be in disgrace.” With God, even infidelity’s ruins can be restored. Start with radical honesty and humility—acknowledge the betrayal fully. Healing demands repentance, forgiveness, and daily acts of trust, brick by brick. It’s hard, like assembling IKEA furniture blindfolded, but God’s grace can turn brokenness into a miraculous, life-giving restoration.

You're here wondering how to save your marriage from divorce, and that's a key first step. Having the heart to reconcile your marriage, with genuine surrender to God, make marriage restoration possible.

5. Manage Your Conflicts

When Winning isn't the Goal

Not every conflict in marriage can be resolved; some are like quirky wallpaper—not ideal, but manageable. Romans 12:18 reminds us, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” The goal isn’t victory but understanding. Reframe arguments as opportunities to understand your spouse’s heart. Set boundaries, cool down, and invite God into the process. With grace, humility, and humor, conflicts become chances for growth, not battlegrounds, building a stronger marriage.

So, knowing these key tips is one thing, but actually applying them effectively and reaping the rewards of a restored marriage is another.

But don't worry, we're here to help.

Meet Dr. Rob & Dr. Lynne

Architects of Marital Transformation

If marriages had superheroes, we’d be your dynamic duo—Dr. Rob, wielding the hammer of insight, and Dr. Lynne, armed with the shield of empathy. Together, we’re less “truth bombs” and more “truth balms,” soothing the aches of miscommunication while equipping you to rebuild stronger than ever.

Our passion? Turning marital messes into masterpieces. Why? Because we’ve seen too many “emotional fixer-uppers” teetering on the edge of foreclosure. But with the right tools and a bit of divine guidance, these love-built homes can transform into solid fortresses of trust and intimacy. After all, isn’t it a bit unfair that IKEA furniture comes with instructions, but marriages often don’t?

At My Relationship Experts, we bring a blend of psychology, faith, and a sprinkle of humor to guide couples through their darkest seasons. Our Marriage Transformation Retreat (MTR) isn’t a band-aid solution or a weekend pep talk. It’s a spiritual and emotional renovation designed for lasting impact. We leverage God’s design for human connection, applying Temperament Therapy to help couples decode each other’s “user manuals”—a process so practical you’ll wonder why you didn’t learn it sooner.

From tackling thorny trust issues to reigniting intimacy that’s gone dim, the Marriage Transformation and Renewal (MTR) Marriage Intensive is a process for profound healing and joyful reconnection. Think of it as marriage boot camp meets divine spa day—a space to sweat through the hard stuff but leave refreshed, renewed, and ready to dance through life together.

Schedule Your Discovery Call

Benefits You Can Expect

Heal Emotional Wounds

Uncover hidden pain, process past hurts, and experience Christ-led restoration, creating a foundation for deeper intimacy and trust.

Rediscover Each Other

Reignite connection and understanding by exploring your spouse’s unique temperament, fostering joy and appreciation for their God-given design.

Restore Your Marriage

Transform your relationship with practical tools and spiritual renewal, building lasting results rooted in love, grace, and shared purpose.

Best thing we ever did for our marriage!

Dr. Rob and Dr. Lynne guided us with wisdom and practical tools, to transform our marriage into a God-centered union. Through His Word and their guidance, we rebuilt lasting love. We believe in us again! Best thing we ever did for our marriage!

DaJuan K.

Their wisdom shaped a lasting foundation.

Dr. Rob and Dr. Lynne gave us clarity and confidence to strengthen our marriage. Their wisdom shaped a lasting foundation. We’re forever grateful! Thank you so much for the personal touch!

Janet M.

Our marriage clarity?

Priceless!

We didn’t want to do it—thought it’d be boring. But wow! You two made it fun, inspiring, and life-changing! That HERO Report? Amazing! Our marriage clarity? Priceless. Seriously, thank you!

Monica A.

How the MTR Marriage Intensive
Works

Step 1: Schedule Your Discovery Call

Get your questions answered and schedule your Discovery Weekend as a Destination Retreat or a Serene Staycation.

Step 2: Enjoy Your Discovery Weekend

Remove all distractions to get to the heart of the matter. Choose from a Destination Retreat in San Antonio, TX (available summer 2025) or a focused Staycation right where you are.

Step 3: Restore Your Marriage

6 weeks of marriage therapy conducted via telehealth, continuing the progress you've made with Dr. Rob and Dr. Lynne.

Schedule Your Discovery Call